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Post by Lucid.]] on Oct 7, 2010 15:00:50 GMT -5
So I'm just curious. I've been constantly heartbroken since about March over my first true love, even though things didn't end with my him completely until July. We were together for nearly 11 months, and he cheated on me with 9 people, of course I didn't know this until after the fact. Anddd I kind of avoided trying to find out because I wanted everything to be perfect between us. So my bad there. You'd think after all that I'd hate him. But we've been trying to stay friends and such for now, seeing as he's got a new girlfriend. He means so much to me, and I don't really have a choice but to remember him forever, if you catch my gist. I still love him to death, and I've been with other guys since dating him, and none of them are the same, and I always mentally compare them to him. Nobody else makes me feel the same way. So I was wondering.... is anyone else in my same situation/has been in it? And how long did it take you to move on?
PS. I'm 17 and YES I do know what love is. This is a difficult thing for me to discuss, so I'd appreciate it if people wouldn't shoot me down and tell me I don't know what I'm talking about because I'm young. That just irks me.
Anyhowwww, go right ahead!
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Post by Rinkái on Oct 7, 2010 15:12:35 GMT -5
): Lucid <33
My first love lasted for 3 years, and I still haven't got over her. Eh, she's getting married to someone next year and I sincerely hope she's happy. I have a boyfriend whom I adore, but the very sound of her name can make me cry. x___x;;
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Post by Jack Sparrow on Oct 7, 2010 17:47:09 GMT -5
Hm, interesting poll! :3 However, I still have yet to find my first love, since I'm 13. Yeah, there's been tiny crushes here & there, but I never really dated, and I don't really find much interest in guys that much. So, I still have yet to find someone. (:
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Post by Sita on Oct 7, 2010 21:29:58 GMT -5
I'm sorry about your situation Lucid. ): I was actually in a very similar situation, and it's tough, but know that time heals for the most part -- and there are a lot of people out there who love you, and would never hurt you like he did. Maybe not romantically, but your friends and family will be there for you.
The gist of my love story: I was on/off with a guy for four and a half years, only to be cheated on, dumped for other girls, and lied to. I didn't deserve it, and he didn't deserve my love.
Only after meeting Evan did I realize that. We've been together for over a year (two years in March!) and I finally feel like I'm in a healthy, functional relationship.
Keep your chin up darling! All of us are here for you. (:
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Post by Chloe on Oct 7, 2010 21:47:41 GMT -5
So sorry that happened, Lucid:[ Hang in there.
My boyfriend is my first love<3 He was my first boyfriend, as well. I was 17 when we started dating, so I think it's definitely possible to know what love is at that age! We both said 'I love you' pretty quickly after we started dating, and a lot of people were skeptical about that. But we're still together, two and a half years later.
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Post by Alex@Marvel on Oct 7, 2010 22:05:18 GMT -5
Easily one week for me..
But for that, the guy did something..well against the law, threatened me, came to my house at the time and started yelling things, making more threats..it took my dad, two of his dogs, and a shotgun to scare the guy off.
I believe he's now in jail..again.
I did love him before all of that, but I feel so stupid now for ever doing so.
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littledoe
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Post by littledoe on Oct 8, 2010 10:37:36 GMT -5
I took this poll as in the first "crush" I had and how long it took for me to get over him. I was in forth grade and liked some kid, and got over him in a few months. After various crushes throughout my years of middle and high school, I actually got together with a friend from 8th grade art class. He moved about 20 minutes away from my town, so I never heard from him. Thanks to Myspace, though, we got back in touch around 10th grade. I've been going out with him since I was 16, and I'm 18 now. I love him so much. He's currently in Basic Training for the Army National Guard, and I couldn't miss him more! Oh, and he's my first boyfriend .
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Post by tiikeri on Oct 17, 2010 16:39:18 GMT -5
I kind of went through the same thing.. I was with my ex for about 6 months before I moved to a different state. At the time we decided to break up and then about 2 months later we decided we wanted to be together but it was long distance.. Friends from the city he was in told me he was cheating on me but I didn't want to believe it. So I ignored it. Well turns out they were telling the truth.. I still didn't want to believe it so I continued to ignore it. A year later, I moved back to the city he was in and about 6 months later I found out that he cheated on me with some girl from work. So that time I couldn't ignore it.. I FORGAVE him and stayed with him. This was a big mistake!! A year later I found out he was cheating on me again with a different girl from a different job! By this time I was over him but still with him. I just gave up at that point. That was about two years after I knew he was cheating so I guess you could say it took about two years for me to get over him since I kept giving him chances. It sucked. So, basically, if someone cheats on you then you really should just leave them alone. It's very likely that they don't care about you enough to make it work. So, why bother? Move on! I'm now married and very happy with my husband! You CAN find someone sort of like your ex but BETTER! I did!
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warf
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Post by warf on Oct 17, 2010 18:47:01 GMT -5
I'm sorry to hear about your sitchiation, Lucid </3
I'm still with my first love, orrrr who I consider to be my first love, but I guess you don't really know until it ends, and you look back.
Of course, that's from that awful rational perspective that makes me sad, so yeah, I would say he's my first love. Ummm, as of last Tuesday, it's been 8 months, and we'd gone out for a month before that last December, mutually, because things were just weird, and I was getting over an old best friend I secretly was infatuated with for a couple years, and he'd just broke up with a very distant friend of mine. We've gotten into a couple of big fights, but both of us are very bothered by the notion of anyone having a problem with us, so they haven't lasted more than a day yet. He and I are both pretty hopeful about this working out for awhile, as hopeful as one can be at the ripe age of fifteen and sixteen.
So, we'll see.
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Post by Lucid.]] on Oct 17, 2010 20:09:25 GMT -5
Woah I forgot about this poll for awhile. But thanks for the support guys <3 It's been very helpful to see your input, it gives me hope that I'll be able to let go someday!
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Post by cath on Oct 17, 2010 20:42:59 GMT -5
Aw sorry to hear what happened to you. <3 Like others have said, you just need time. My first love eh... In hindsight, I think it was when I was 15/16, and it was literally the most adorable thing ever! At school, we would sneak off from our friends during break and lunch to hold hands and kiss behind the Religious Studies block (irony.. kind of). Then he took me to Prague for a week! It made me so sad when we broke up; he seemed more and more distant, so eventually I confronted him about it and we decided on splitting. Although we did have an on/off thing for a few months after that... Now, we're just really good friends! I've even texted his current girlfriend for him before because his phone was out of service ahah, and it wasn't awkward. I only regard him as my first love because I've never felt the same about anyone else since, but who knows? Perhaps I haven't actually met my first true love yet. ;D
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Deshy
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Post by Deshy on Oct 18, 2010 7:53:13 GMT -5
Mine first true love did not last long at all. Not because it was working because of peer presure. Some of the girls that i was friends with were like Why do you like him he's fat, he has a fat bum. Fatty fatty bum bum. This kept going on and i just couldnt deal with it. we tryed but it just crushed me and we ended up breaking up. I never really loved anyone since then. Yeah i dated the odd guy but it was never the same, never. I stilll really really like him but i have moved country and i have no clue where he went. As we went our sperate ways in school. But we were really good freinds. Im not intrested much anymore, i have my dog cat and horse and im happy with them haha
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Post by Ela @ GK on Oct 25, 2010 7:14:38 GMT -5
My first love - He and I were together just under a month, then he went back to his ex (with whom he had a child). They had another kid, things got worse, they split up, and two years after he and I are back together. Been a year now (as of Oct. 20th) and we're together and madly in love.
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Post by Spell on Oct 25, 2010 10:19:15 GMT -5
^ Aww <3
I have never been in love and have never had a boyfriend. I have had guy friends who have wanted to date me but I just didn't think of them that way. I'm still friends with some of them and still think of them and "just friends" or brothers. I duno guys.. I have never felt "that way" towards anyone. Duno if I ever will.
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Post by loxfiredance on Oct 25, 2010 12:50:22 GMT -5
it took me a long time to think about my reply to this thread, lol.
I'm still with "the one" for me (as no other bloke can cut it like he does - if I wasn't with him, I'd be with another girl. he's an exeption ;p) However we went out once before when I was 14, he was 15, and he reeeeally hurt me back then. However he sorted his act out, and when he was 16 & I was 15, we started going back out again. We'll have been together 6 years on Nov. 15th.
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